Last weekend our oldest son was playing in an AAU basketball game in Greensboro. It was the start of an AAU season that had us all excited. Our son took a steal at half court, and took off on a fast break. A defender landed on him after his layup and my son’s leg was fractured in two places. If you knew my son, you would know the passion he has for basketball. And if you know me, you know that watching my son enjoy and pursue his passion for the game I also love is one of my greatest pleasures. There is no doubt that I shared his excitement and anticipation for the upcoming AAU season.
I’ve been wrestling with disappointment this week knowing that this AAU season won’t be what we were hoping for. If he’s lucky, he may be back by the very end of it. I think it’s therapeutic to write down your thoughts, so I figured that I would go ahead and share my thoughts about dealing with disappointment. This is really just me, preaching to myself.
- Stay grounded I think this is kind of pre-work. You have to know where you’re grounded. For me, it’s in my faith. You need a foundation and a strong core so that you don’t get shaken beyond what’s healthy. I did a Gallup Strength Finders test for my work at Torrent Consulting. It’s a personality test that rates your strengths from 1 to 34. My number one strength was Belief, so I guess it’s a no brainer that this is where my thoughts go first. If you’ve never used Strength Finders, and you like to learn about that kind of stuff, I would strongly recommend it. gallupstrengthcenter.com
- Look it in the face and call it what it is – I figure the worst thing you can do is try to hide the fact that you’re disappointed. Like anything else, I guess you have to accept it first. It’s important to be real with yourself and those around you. I’m super bummed for my son. And honestly, I’m super bummed myself. It’s ok to be disappointed.
- Find perspective and be thankful This is a pretty easy one, actually, if you just take a step back and think about it. We have so many things to be thankful for, regardless of the current circumstance. There’s always something worse, someone who’s dealing with something worse than you are and there’s always something good that can come from it.
- Look forward What’s done is done. You can’t go back, so let’s accept it and move on. It’s not the end of your story, it’s just part of your story. I think it’s important to re-evaluate and set new goals, looking forward to a brighter future. Maybe it looks different than you thought it would, but different doesn’t mean it’s worse.
- Move on with purpose This is a big one for me. I think you need to find purpose in what you’re doing and go after it with passion. There’s something to learn from what you’re going through. I’m sitting here at home a little disappointed in myself for this week that has been, that I haven’t made better use of it. I could have done better this week. I could have been a better mom, a better employee and a better wife. If I learn from every situation and move on with purpose, I believe I can and I will do better. I believe that if my son can embrace these concepts, and I’m certain he will, that he can come back stronger and better than ever. He can use this time to learn and grow, he can use it to be stronger mentally, and he can use it to encourage someone else in the future. I know he will.